One lady who had flown in from Outer Slobbovia and didn't understand Slobbovian knitting politics too well said to the Upper Slobbovian lady, "What on earth were you trying to do there? You could have killed our dear leader, you know!" The representative from the Cleverclogs Knitting Company took the Upper Slobbovian lady gently by the arm and whispered reassurances in her ear. Then he took her to lunch and persuaded her that everybody could knit together for his company, since the company didn't really give a damn about patterns anyway.
When the meeting resumed after lunch, the heavy-set woman gave a short pep talk promoting the International Upper Slobbovian Ladies' Knitting Circle. She explained that one of its attractive features was that ladies from Upper Slobbovia could not become members, since the Cleverclogs Knitting Company had legal issues in Upper Slobbovia. Finally she raised her fist in the air, told everyone, "The Slob Mountain Inner Circle is omnipotent," and sat down. Then her pretty little girlfriend stood up and chirrupped, "Now, then! Who would like to join the International Upper Slobbovian Ladies' Knitting Circle? Please raise your hands!"
And lo and behold, out of the entire crowd at the symposium only one confused little man raised his hand (and he was the official hairdresser to the Slob Mountain Inner Circle anyway)!
Moral: If you already have authentic patterns, tend to your own damn knitting and stay far away from Slob Mountain.
Posted by jjeffrey at November 8, 2003 03:24 PM